There’s a moment in Jurassic World Rebirth that encapsulates the entire film so perfectly I can think of no better way to start this review:
The unlikable college boyfriend of the unlikable daughter in the completely auxiliary family subplot says something confusing about his past that is never mentioned again. He then walks offscreen and, in the very next shot, walks straight toward the camera—and starts peeing.
The sound design is aggressive. Jungle foliage sizzles. He pees forever.
Then, behind him: an epic dinosaur fight erupts. Carnage, chaos, glory. When it’s over, he resumes peeing, midstream.
And it works.
Welcome…to Jurassic World: Rebirth.
I went into this film with a short checklist—just five questions—to help me not be a snob about a summer action movie with dinosaurs. It wasn’t complicated:
- Are the dinosaurs cool?
Absolutely. The dinosaurs look better than they ever have—by land, by sea, and by air. Do I normally care about character development, coherent stakes, and emotional continuity? Yes. Did I notice that half the cast is introduced and immediately discarded, that backstories fizzle out unresolved, and that most plot beats are just winks at the original film? I did.
Did I care? Not even slightly.
The dinosaurs are incredible. From romantically entangled Titanosaurs to terrifying mutadons, every prehistoric moment delivers. Total success.
- Is the score awesome?
Alexandre Desplat, paying direct homage to John Williams, absolutely nails it. His reimagined themes feel like a love letter to the original—familiar but not lazy, nostalgic but not derivative. Desplat walks the tightrope perfectly, crafting a score that feels expansive, emotional, and new. Even when a character we’ve been with for 40 minutes doesn’t have a name, the music makes you root for them.
Huge check.
- Is the action awesome?
Yes, and this is where Rebirth sets itself apart from its five deeply mid predecessors. Yes, they all had dinosaurs almost eating people. But this one repackages that danger with fresh energy and genuinely impressive VFX. The peril sequences are sharp, suspenseful, and occasionally spectacular—even when the people in danger are entirely forgettable.
Check.
- Does it bring anything new to the franchise?
It doesn’t give us a morally complex human like John Hammond, the original’s gleeful capitalist demigod. But it does have a stance: Big Pharma is bad. Capitalism is killing us. Everyone deserves cures. That messaging is…fine. It flares up and fades fast.
But what really counts is that Rebirth delivers new creatures. Big ones. Mutated ones. Terrifying ones. The scale is bigger, the designs are weirder, and the monster moments are genuinely new. The franchise didn’t evolve morally, but it did genetically.
New stuff: check.
- Is the acting awesome?
Mmmm…it’s fine. Could’ve used more Mahershala Ali, because he’s Mahershala Ali. Scarlett Johansson carries exactly the amount of water she’s supposed to and does it well. The rest of the cast is, well, present. But the film wisely leans hard on its stars, and Ali gets his proper hero moment—just when the movie needs one.
As for the real actors—the dinosaurs? They deliver.
Call the acting “adequate,” but in the best possible way.
So yes, Jurassic World: Rebirth passed my test.
See it with friends. Laugh when it sucks. Gasp when it rules. Eat popcorn. Don’t overthink it. We’ll all be fossils soon anyway.
It’s summer. Long live dinosaurs.
